Netiquette

Hello again.

As many of you know, I have been threatening for some time to write a book about electronic etiquette.  I just never seem to get around to it.  And I am, at times, pretty lazy (and am prone to writer’s block).  So I never get started.  And if one never gets started … well nothing happens.  And if nothing happens … well, you end up getting no where.  And if you never get anywhere, you’re just stuck.  And I don’t want to get stuck.

Having (obviously) given this some thought, I’ve come to the conclusion that a book could be started as a blog post and like a seed, grow from there.  So here we go.

Rule 1.0  Never, Ever, Text or Email While Driving.  This seems like it should be a no brainer.  But I see so many people texting while driving that I suspect that every accident must have been caused by someone who was texting while driving.  If you have memory problems and you need to remember just one thing about cell phone use, then remember this one rule.  I don’t want to be injured, or God forbid killed, because some idiot was texting something like “I just love Justin Bieber” to their BFF.

Rule 2.1  Do Not Use Your Cell Phone while:

  1. In church.
  2. In Court.
  3. At the movies.
  4. In line to buy something.
  5. Having any meal.
  6. Having sex (really?).
  7. Watching TV.
  8. In an elevator (be real, it probably won’t work anyway and I don’t want to hear you keep saying “Are you there? Are you there?).
  9. Standing next to the person you are talking to, texting or emailing (and the point is?).
  10. In the middle of an in-person conversation with someone (its rude).
  11. Riding a bike (I’m not sure how you would do it anyway, but it clearly is not safe).
  12. On a date (except with permission, which must be requested in advance).
  13. In a public restroom.
  14. Handling any kind of firearm, explosive device or highly flammable material. (Need a reason?)
  15. Operating heavy machinery. (You should be paying attention to what you’re doing).

Rule 2. 2  Exceptions – Rule 2.1 does not apply:

  1. When you are alone (except at church, but see Rule 2.2.2).
  2. When there is an emergency.
  3. When the President is on the line.
  4. When you want to tell someone you  just  won the PowerBall Lottery.
  5. When using the vibrate feature exclusively (See Rule 2.1.6, above).
  6. When you are engaged in an in-person conversation that you are desperate to end.

I think this is a nice start, but there is so much more to address.  I encourage you to collaborate with me on this effort, so please tell me some of your rules in the comment section.

Stay tuned.

One thought on “Netiquette

  1. -Re-read your email before you send it. You may just sound like a dick.
    -If you ever think your email could be misinterpreted as “rude,” you can usually fix that with putting a smiley face at the end of the sentence.

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