Budget Host Inn

Hello again everyone.

Hollywood and I woke up this morning at the Budget Host Inn in Columbia, Missouri.  She has an interview with the University of Missouri School of Veterinary Medicine.  You see, Hollywood wants to be a vet.  And to be a vet, you have to get into vet school.  She is charming the pants off the selection committee as we speak.

And that is not an easy thing to do.

But that is not why I am writing this morning.  I want to tell you a little something about the Budget Host Inn.  First, it is nestled just north of Interstate 70 near Providence Road.  When I say nestled just north, I mean it is practically on the highway itself.

img_3642We were lucky enough to get a room in the building that faces the highway.  The walls were paper thin.  The din from the highway was unsettling to say the least.  Trucks, cars, motorcycles … yes, loud motorcycles.  All night long.  Hollywood and I might as well have been “sleeping” in a tent in the median.

img_3641I did not sleep at all.  I spent the night rolling from side to side like a swing goes back and forth.  A longer night I cannot remember.  Worst night in a hotel … ever!

And did I mention the smell?

Old.  It smelled old.  Like L’Orient smells old.  Like the basement at Hereford smells old.  Like some people smell old.  Not totally offensive.  Just not neutral like a normal place or new like a  new place.  It smelled old.  You had to get used to it.

img_3636The TV was not a flat screen.  It looked like one you might find on the street in front of someone’s house.  The big fat kind.  With the big picture tube.  Where did they find it?  You can buy a 55 inch flat screen lcd tv for $259 at Best Buy.  Probably get a discount for a volume purchase.  What is the matter with these people.

By now you are probably wondering how the bed was.  Not new.

Not firm, not soft, kinda in between.  The sheets and bed spread were … you guessed it … OLD.  I mean at least 10 years old.  The spread was showing signs of coming apart.  The sheets were very thin.  As a consequence of my tossing and turning, the sheets came right off the mattress.  By morning my skin was in direct contact with the mattress.  I don’t think that was a good thing.

img_3643Hollywood slept on top of her sheets.  Not between them.  She shared with me the reason, but it was so gross, I won’t dare share it here.  If you really want to know, you’ll have to ask her.  Trust me, the Old Lady would have high tailed it out of there.  The problem made pilled sheets seem like new satin sheets.  Ack!

There was a transom above the door.  It was loose … partially open.  I tried to close it, but it would not stay shut.  All the better to let the highway noise into the room.

And how much did this delightful little place cost me?  $100!!!  Tax included.  For this price I reasonably expected quiet and not so much old.

The best thing about the place was that it was directly next door to a Waffle House.  More on that later.

Thanks for reading and stay tuned.

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